it can be such a dirty word, no? some are afraid to ask for it and others seek answers for everything. Me? i used to refuse a helping hand until confidence escaped me and i drifted to the latter, reaching far and wide for “help” — psychics, shamans, shrinks to give me answers. eventually i came back to me: who i am, what i have + what i seek. So, I’m not looking for help - i’m looking for collaboration.
I’m not looking for a caretaker, or to be a caregiver, i’m looking for a partner.
But seeking outward instead of looking wtihin, for help -- is not my way forward. let me clarify -- we all need an extra hand sometimes, but there is a difference in “needing” help and asking for guidance. In relationships, when one person becomes needy---the relationship is off balance.
When we are our best versions of self, in our flow, our energy attracts just that, different than energy put out in times of need, in desperation. In need, we attract disconnection disguised as connection because it is sourced from a disconnected place, from a place of need.
example: I need HELP for my business to grow.
I need HELP finding the answers.
Or HELP to be my best self.
Or a PARTNER to make me feel full.
Seeking outward is not the way forward.
Some ask for help + others are afraid it shows weakness. it is a happy balance, no doubt. To grow in life, in work + love, i believe collaboration is the key. Businesses stay small when owners suffocate - when they don’t delegate, when they micro mange. Children grow up needy, not self sufficient when parents just give what is asked for - be it help, money, answers, guidance, etc. And relationships end up broken if one party is seeking fulfillment or definition thru the other.
We must be full on our own before we can be full for another. Confidence in ourselves rather than seeking help outside. A man recently asked me how i became so open in life in heart in spirit. He said, when did you decide to love yourself.”? My response, unknown. But i woke up one day and i chose me - like the little engine that could, i think i can i think i can i think i can. Because if you choose to be your first choice, you will be chosen first, and i will never turn back — in life, work + in love. Is everyday gumdrops + happy hour? Yes. and sometimes it is to fuel my life and sometimes it is to fill a void because i’m feeling less than best and seeking help thru sugar or substance to make me feel full. But for the most part, me, as i am, is all i need.
And with that, partnership and collaboration in work, life + love, will just add to the life that i love, the life that i choose, the life that is mine.
Are you willing to look within to see what you’re hiding from?